Mar 15, 2008

yesterday.. (LONG POST, BUT WORTH IT)

was a freaking blur. i now understand why frank and missi always say "theres always something to do when you live in la."

so the day started at 5:30am...

i woke up did my usual tooth brushing, face washing and took off for crossfit. yesterday morning was hell.

warmup:
3 minutes of each
tornado ball
balancing of weight clubs
fast bag punching
agility latter
indo board squats + medicine ball
jump roping
snap cables

i was pretty winded after that...

workout:
neverending squats... (while one person from the class flipped a 260lb monster truck tire another had to run 400m... once that was done you switched your ball you were squatting over to the next in line to the monster truck tire and then to running 400m) it was crazy difficult.
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(the stupid tire)
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(our gym, you can see the agility latter on the ground!)
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(those are the weight clubs and that dude is working on the fast bags in the corner)

drove home..

cleaned..

rob was put on the list for the DCMA store opening party (it opens to the public today).. so he finagled me into going. i didnt know what to wear or what kind of party this was going to be... anyway, i managed to get ready and wear some frilly top with black slacks (red lips too!).

we arrived and the street our showroom is on was blocked off. all i saw were paparazzi cameras blinking away. i just thought "oh shit, what did we get into". but it was the polite thing to do since rob has talked with the dcma dudes about doing a colab and their store is run by our showroom guys (AGENDA). needless to say we had to walk down a red carpet... i was so embarrassed. we got inside and saw seth, aaron and kelen. rob drank too much. saw way too many people from gossip mags and then i wanted to leave. apparently the back of my shirt had become unbuttoned and matt skiba's wife (who is just as beautiful as he is) buttoned my shirt up for me. how incredibly sweet, right? oh and toby from H20's kid was dancing to soulja boy.. the world is gonna end (it was pretty cute though).

off to frank and missi's we go. smoked a little with missi's friend brian, who is incredible, while watching gummo. frank tries to wake rob up but in a matter of 5 minutes rob managed to become annihilated. he had 4 drinks and smoked... so today he swears he was drugged... hah, im just convinced he's a lightweight. we took off to what we thought would be a dominatrix party?? (missi and frank used to be neighbors with a dominatrix and no she doesnt have sex.)

we arrive at 6th and spring to some lofts called the SB lofts. rob insists on sleeping in the car. frank, missi and i walk inside to a gigantic predator statue?
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the security guard asks who were looking for. missi mumbles "janine and :::i cant remember his name:::" the guard tells us "okay you need to go to PH14" which i later put together that PH=PENTHOUSE! so we walk into PH14 and its like walking into studio 54. crazy fashionistas everywhere, racks of clothing scattered all over the "PH" (its fashion week in los angeles) and tons of booze. a dj was spinning some great songs and everyone was so welcoming... but we all put together that we were at the entirely WRONG PARTY.

so were wandering around this party where we arent supposed to be in awe of how much was going on. someone mentioned to us "go to the top story" "wait, this loft has floors?!" "yeah, there are four..." so we find this staircase and wind around the stairs until we manage to make it to what seems like a top floor. breathtaking views of downtown los angeles, a freaking DOPE jacuzzi and TONS of people. fan-fucking-tastic. then i realize im seeing a ton of people who work at this vintage store on la brea called JET RAG. i overhear someone mention "yeah, this is the owner of jet rag's loft." how weird. josh JUST took me to jet rag a week ago. wonderful store. time to go to the RIGHT party. but wait, a man who's line is being shown inside the loft tells me "your hair is so light" petting me. i swear he was rolling, or something.

walk to janine's house (all the while rob is passed out in the car, god he missed out). walk inside another crazy loft and this time, i can tell, were at the right party. everyone was wearing dark clothing, TALL shoes and chokers. missi runs over and hugs a woman who im assuming is janine. i shake her hand. she was so beautiful! everyone was vibing off of everyone else... it was insane. if you made eye contact with people they would initiate conversation. it was so sexual and almost scary to me. anyway, im having a conversation with frank, missi and janine's husband while two feet away from me a woman has her dress lifted up over her waist, she is bent over a counter and being spanked... FOR THIRTY MINUTES! janine's husband proceeded to tell us "dont worry, its her birthday" oh okay, birthday spankings? anyway, it was definitely not your usual spanking. people were biting her ass, rubbing it and licking her thighs... pretty much foreplay in public. it was insane.

all of a sudden about 15 people start making their way into the hallway. missi felt inclined to follow.. im so glad she did. were going up to the 9th floor and have no clue what were about to experience. we walk in and see a desk. large black curtains are surrounding it, covering the entry to what seems to be other rooms? janine proceeds to tell us that this is her new dom academy (dom=dominatrix). she shows us a room that is theater play, a kitchen for those naughty housewives and then we walk into this crazy sex swing filled room. seriously. cages, chains, bars hanging from the ceiling, sex swings and tables you get tied onto. wow. they ask if anyone wants to be trampled. we pushed frank up front and sure enough... FRANK WAS TRAMPLED! this lady held two bars coming from the ceiling and walked all over him while he was laying on the floor.
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when we left the party, we all had this look on our face like "did tonight REALLY happen?" we all talked about it over some greasy grody brite spot food. hooray for LA... my shell has been cast away.

yes this did happen.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

Duuude,
This is a funny story. I am actually moving to LA between now and the beginning of June. I cannot flippin' wait!! We might move to your hood, so we should hang out sometime!!